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NauenThen: Something's up & I can't add posts at the moment. The tech people at the Authors Guild are trying to fix it. Back as soon as possible! 

RULES OF THE WORLD BY JOHNNY STANTON

1) You must read slower than me
2) My book is fatter than your book but
3) You are fatter than me
4) Stay on your side of the bed
5) Your belongings stay on your side of the bed/room/closet/shelf
a. My side is bigger than yours
b. My dick is bigger than yours.
c. My naps are longer than yours.
6) No facial masks
a. No funny makeup
b. No strange hairdos
c. No unusual hats
7) Half your dinner is mine
a. Ditto coffee (milk no sugar)
b. Also $$, shirts, etc.
8. Tidy at all times!
9) Fuck you
10) See what you made me do

transcribed by Elinor Nauen
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