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The photo that almost cost me my marriage

I know, I know, it's hard to figure out what's even going on in this picture so how could it have (almost) ruined my marriage?

If you look closely, you can make out that it's a picture of a couch falling. It's a couch falling because we threw it out my window. It was aqua-green with a kind of nubby finish & no legs. It was curved too. Not comfortable & it took up a lot of room, given that only one or maybe 2 people could sit on it.

Johnny was new in my life & I had one of rare fits of home improvement. Or maybe I threw it out to symbolize the future. What a satisfying hollow explosion it made falling into the courtyard!

I know Maggie was involved but I no longer remember who took the picture. It happened fast—how'd we get a picture at all? I proudly showed it to Johnny.

I should have known: he'd been a super for 20 years & was aghast that I threw furniture out the window. It didn't calm him down that I'm in back—it's not like I endangered any passerby. He was so mad. He thought I was too much of a nitwit to date. He thought I was a midwestern nincompoop who would never be able to keep up with his city smarts.

Good thing he had the fire down below or that would've been that.
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